The Detox – Things to Let Go Of After 30

In our first 20+ years of life we pick up multiple habits – good and bad. The old adage goes, “You can’t teach an old dog new tricks.” I don’t believe that in the least. I believe that minds can be changed, habits can be broken, and we can enjoy our 30s free from the baggage we collected in our earlier years.

In order to do this, we’ll have to let go of some things. We need to let go of:


Whether it was the friend who betrayed you, the parent who abandoned you, the person who abused you or the co-worker who ate your food out of the company fridge. We’ve got to let go of grudges. They are unhealthy and they block your blessings. Some of us will never be happy, because we are too busy being mad at those who have done us wrong. Let it go. You will thank yourself later.

Negative talk and gossip

Lord knows I’m working on this one, but it absolutely HAS to go. It serves no purpose, and only keeps us in a negative mindset. Have you ever started talking about a person or negative situation, only to find that just talking about it makes your mood worse? We internalize what we hear, so if we are constantly hearing negative talk (even from ourselves), that is how we are going to feel. Let’s go with the oldie but goodie “If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.”

Hanging out with people you don’t like

I often wonder why people do this. My facial expressions are much to honest for me to do this, but really. Stop  it. I understand that good friends are hard to come by, but association breeds assimilation. You haven’t made progress because the people you surround yourself with aren’t going anywhere. Cut them off and keep it moving.

Staying in relationships that aren’t fulfilling

You deserve happiness. You deserve peace. You deserve to have someone that can and will love you like  you need to be loved. I know, I know, there is a shortage of good people.. or at least that’s what they say. I disagree. I think there are plenty of great people out there, but they can’t find each other because they are tied up in relationships with people who are no good. We all know (or are) really great people who are dating or married to people who are SO not good to them. Don’t be that person.

Staying in jobs that don’t value your talents

What if I told you that the recession can’t stop what God has for you? You don’t have to stay in a job that doesn’t work for you just to have a job. Now don’t rush out and quit, but be on the look out. You may have to take a temporary reduction in pay, but sometimes you need to step down to move up. Go where you are valued.


Your life doesn’t need to look like everyone else’s. So what if your bestie is married with children. So what if your cousin has a 6-figure job. So what if your co-worker in the cubicle next to you gets to travel the world. That’s not your business. Live life on your own terms, and don’t fall into society’s Myths about Adulting.

Constantly buying things you don’t need

Yes, you have money. Yes, you have credit cards. However, that does not mean that you need to spend all of it. If you are over 30, you are probably making enough to NOT be living check to check. Sure you can buy things you want, but set a budget and stick to it. You will thank yourself later.

3rd, 4th, 5th, 6th, and 7th chances

Now I know I said hold no grudges, but there is a difference between not holding a grudge and allowing people to consistently and habitually disappoint you. Whether it is the unreliable friend or the person you are dating that just can’t get it right, as an adult, we don’t need more than 2 reminders. After that, a person is just taking advantage. One of my favorite verses is Titus 3:10-11, which says “Warn a divisive person once, and then warn them a second time. After that, have nothing to do with them. You may be sure that such people are warped and sinful.”

I believe if we can begin to let go of some of these things, we can begin to walk into our abundant lives. I’m sure there are some things I have missed. Feel free to share some things that YOU feel need to be let go of in your 30s.

*This is the 3rd segment of my Life After 30 series. You can read the first two parts here:

Life After 30 – 10 Myths about Adulting

7 Things I Learned From Dating After 30


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